A Goodbye

People sayC360_2014-12-13-21-55-37-493-1 that bidding a goodbye is the hardest part in the whole life. The good news is it is true. Making a decision to say goodbye is always hard for most people, yet they do it. Many reasons go out from their mouth, such as there is nothing they can fight for anymore.

“What can we do when a relationship is not longer as strong as yesterday because our couple chooses to ignore it?”

No, no one can do anything. Even the wisest man on this earth, cannot do anything to improve the already-ignored relationship. Bidding a goodbye seems to be the best solution.

When we already say goodbye, there are times when we regret everything. Wish we could turn back time. But, no we cannot. Once the decision has been made, you cannot take it back and pretend that we can back to the way we used to. If you naively do it, the atmosphere will not be the same, ever.

Cry until your eyes puff. Scream until your vocal cords hurt. Get furious until you are short of breath. Curse as many as you can. Do it all if those can make you satisfy.

Don’t blame yourself by saying “I shouldn’t do it,” “I’ve made a big mistake,” “how stupid I am,” and so on. It is useless.

If you need to isolate yourself for days, weeks, or months then do it. Look into a mirror when you are crying and angry. See how hurt you are and how red your eyes are.

After you feel that you are quite ok, take a deep breath and write down your thoughts in a piece of paper. Spit it out, don’t hesitate. If your eyes are teary again, let it out. Cry as much as you want. Make the paper wet and unreadable. Write it down until you are exhausted.

Then, take another paper. Write the word “goodbye” until the paper is full of your hand-writing. When it’s already full, look it carefully. Take a picture of that paper and post it to your blog, instagram, facebook, twitter, or whatever. Make people know and read your post.

After you do all that stuffs, open the door and step the border. Don’t try to forget your couple after bidding a goodbye. On the contrary, you have to remember them; remembering that you have said a farewell message. With that memory in your mind, live your life and chase your dream.

Someday…

Someday the almighty time will take everything away. Memory, pain, angry and regret will be gradually replaced by your life and dream. And when someone dig the hidden treasure, you shall remember it in nostalgic and hilarious way. Hopefully, it will come true. We wish we can do.

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The Actor, The Girl, and The Show

These past five years, she was an audience of the greatest show on Earth.

Never before she watched the same person in a million times.

She knew the show well; even the location of a confetti.

Now, the show is over.

The actor has finally retired from his greatest stage.

Nothing left; even his sweat.

The actor said he finally settled to one of the beautiful thing in his whole life.

Leaving his loyal audiences astonished on their chair.

So does that girl.

She sits still, waiting for an unbelievable miracle.

Everyone leaves, everyone turns their head down.

She stays and believes until she becomes the only human being on that show.

She believes that it was one of the show

A new scene

“Do I have passed this scene?” she asks

Suddenly, the unbelievable miracle happened.

The actor came with a smile and a gun on his hand.

Her sweat is falling down and her heart is beating fast.

The beloved actor is the one behind the trigger.

The one who will shoot her right in her chest

She looks into the actor’s eyes

A blank stare of her

“Is this the end?” asks she.

Who am I?

Who am I?

That is what I always ask to myself in every situation; good or worse.

I try to be like them who are open minded and act based on your feeling. But, that sentence hits me once again.

Who am I?

Laugh when a happiness come? When did the last time a happiness come and was made for me? When did they cheer me up? Just now?

Does my smile means that I am happy? Ya… They are right. I am happy, so don’t think about me. Just do whatever you are doing right now. Who am I to prevent your important activity?

Complaining is such an easy thing for them. Go ahead and complain anything which popped out in your brain. I’ll be glad to hear and apologize. Besides, who am I to forbid your idea?

I can’t see them cry. I don’t want to be their reason to cry. Thus, I try to lend my shoulder. Who am I to complain when they forget me? Am I their conscience?  But, no I don’t want to make them feel guilty  on me.

Being a good listener brings happiness. Being the one who is forgotten is a bless

Am I tough?

Am I pretending?

Am I a villain?

Am I hurt?

No, never mind. No one hears my scream. No one answers my questions. No one… Because, who am I?